hellugh:

toxxic-fairyy:

This guy has the biggest balls

"did she say yes? …..hell yea"

(Source: my-jane-doe, via laughingisbetter)

Cake Boss in a nutshell…

barebackbearyak:

Customer: I want a nice chocolate cake for my young son, and he likes trucks, so could you maybe do a little frosting picture of a truck on the top?

Cake Boss: SOS WHAT WES GUNNA DO IS MAKE A GIANT TRUCK ENTIRELY OUTTA RICE CRISPIES AND COVA DAT IN FONDANT AND IZ GUNNA SHOOT SPARKS AND CATCH FIYAH, POSSIBLY KILLIN YOUR SON IN DA PROCESS.

(via the-pantyraider)

badafro:

the youngest  person in the world just got born

(via unescapable)

averagefairy:

moms are so temperamental you say one thing like “have you seen my hoodie” and theyre like your HOODIE??? YOUR HOODIE???? DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY THINGS I HAVE TO DO EVERY DAY AND YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO KEEP TRACK OF YOUR HOODIE? NOBODY HELPS ME IN THIS HOUSE I DO EVERYTHING BY MYSELF AND NOBODY ASKS HOW I AM YOUR FATHER IS AN ALCOHOLIC 

(via acasualaffair)

  • Kid: Yeah give me a pack of Marlboro Reds.
  • Cashier: Are you 18?
  • Kid: It's okay, they're a metaphor.
145,612 plays

thisisnotmyfairytaleendingg:

Give Me Love - Demi Lovato (left ear) and Ed Sheeran (right ear)

Ear sex tbh.

(Source: useyourmelody, via collar-b-o-n-e)

yungbasedblogger:

where can i get one of those kim kardashian or paris hilton jobs where they just kind of pay you to exist

(via collar-b-o-n-e)